went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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