Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize