Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
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You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
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Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize