it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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