i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I just sucked dick on a ferry
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
