you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
