She even gives head with a lisp.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
