So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
