you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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