Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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