About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
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The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
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I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.