this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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