I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
