i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
