I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize