so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
