hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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