he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
