4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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