if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
You have to summon your inner elephant
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
