Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
