I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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