its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
