so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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