Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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