You can't motorboat a personality
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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