I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.