guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
