i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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