Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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