dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
