The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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