I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blew my weed a kiss
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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