I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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