How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
