dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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