Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
