Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Did I show you my penis last night?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
