i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
