I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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