Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
