dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize