So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
