2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
