Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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