I just made out with a guy for $7.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
