Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize