you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Randomize
