During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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