I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
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