I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
