we're blogging at a bar
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
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